While writing this post this afternoon, I started over because of something that came up on my Facebook page. I love how some good things can go viral; all you have to do is hit the share button and put it on your wall. The picture today was what I viewed and shared. Consider how hard it is to change yourself, then you will understand how small a chance you have of changing others.
Today I was thinking of this and how life happens sometime. I think back to when I was a young man, how I was trying to change other people. Then I look at the young kids, or young adults today who tell us how we should change our ways to make the world a better place. It reminds me of the poster my parents showed me that said: “Quick! Move out on your own while you still know it all.”
As I am older now and have adult children of my own, I remember how it was so easy to have this great vision of the world but with no experience to back it up. I recall one time telling my dad how things couldn’t work a certain way and he should change; Dad got very angry with me. To him I was telling him the way that he fed me and kept a roof over my head all those years was wrong. Very few times in life did I push him that far, but when I did, he had a great way of pushing back usually followed by the something about how stupid I was. The last time I made a comment to him like that, I was in my mid 30s. I was just starting to get the picture I now have; I was just beginning to realize trying to change him was not my job.
I found many of the times I was trying to change a boss, a partner, my brothers, that I should have learned to change myself instead, if I really believed in change, I would have gone out and lived it on my own first. It is hard to change yourself, yet so many of us try to change others having no belief that we can change ourselves.
I recall working with counselors, and watching other coaches try to work with couples. You can always tell where the problem is when two people are not getting along. My favorite to see is each of them telling you how the other is wrong and needs to change. Truth is, we can only change ourselves, and if each would stop and go to their corners and change themselves, letting the other person work on their own problems, I know we would see more results come and less fighting.
As I mentioned last week we only get one life so why waste it trying to change what you can’t? It’s time to take your own life into your hands, to see what you can change and work on yourself. When you change you, then you will see an awesome world open up in front of you. Do you believe in change? Then start with changing you.